Keeping aside the fundamental question, do we actually need to judge people, but if at all we have to, how do we judge – by the traits that are visible? Or the thoughts that are invisible? Do you look at a person differently when you get to know some of his or her ‘secrets’ or the invisible behaviour. For me the answer has been yes in most of the cases and then I had to take other actions to undo the change in perception.
I had come across an article based on this and since then am haunted by this thought. Illustrating the same using my example – there are some people whom I definitely wish to avoid, however when I end up meeting them, I talk so nicely, listen to them patiently and so they look forward to meet me. Even while I am with them, my mind is constantly thinking when will I free from all this. For those people I am a good soul, as they have judged me from the behaviour they have seen. In actual, I am not good as they think, since my mind is constantly trying to avoid them and get out the situation. How should I be judged in this case?
I hate smokers. I feel those guys in spite of knowing the risks due to smoking, still go ahead with it. When for any of my acquaintances, I get to know they smoke, they step down in my eyes. I start looking at them differently. Behaviours wise, thinking wise they may be excellent, still I have a different perception. Am I wrong in judging these people based on one habit, though I am aware of all the good parts of them??
The article which I had read had examples of couples, who were perfectly honest with each other, but on some occasions had dreams or fantasies of being with some other man/ woman. Does having such a thought, itself means infedility??
When it comes to recruiting people, the interview is a process of selecting people based on the facts presented and answers by the candidates, and the judgement of interviewer. The ability and maturity of the interviewer to look beyond the appearance and presentation has an impact on the decision to recruit.
If in a relationship, one intends to give a surprise to the other one, and due to some, reason the surprise fails. Should the other one be disappointed that he/ she didn’t get the surprise or be happy for the fact that someone thought of and tried to give a surprise?? Judge based on the visible outcome or the invisible intent?? If am in the role of recruiter, do I have the confidence that my judgement would be right? Or if someone is selecting a life partner, how to guarantee their decision is right?
With all the reasoning and scientific methods available to evaluate a person, the most important decisions are often based on intuition, isn’t it??