Being a parent · Relationships

One of my worst fears..

To get into the habit of writing regularly again, I had decided to write book reviews.. but never did that.. So a few weeks back again took up the task but with a clause.. unless I write the book review or write something connected to the book.. I wont take up next book for reading.. and it did work

Sudha Murthy is one of my favorite amongst Indian authors.. I think I have read all the books written by her .. which I am aware of.. and which are in English.. be the short story collection or a novel.. it touches my heart.. and many a times.. my deepest emotions.. Being an Indian, I can easily connect to the story.. The short story collection.. are based on her experiences .. as a teacher, social worker, mother, wife etc.. and the novels.. mostly are women-centric.. where the female is main protagonist..

The book which I finished reading now had an insight about today’s generation, their ambition, thoughts, attitude towards life and family.. there comes a time in a persons life.. where the career growth is acceleration and in order to achieve more success.. more hard work goes in.. unfair practices are adopted, “be practical” attitude is adopted.. all this works well.. but there is other side of coin too.. the family life.. relationships are affected. Well.. one earns more.. for the family, their comfort.. but if you are unable to spend time with your family in pursuit of running behind success.. whats the point??

And that’s my worst fear.. what if I also end up doing that?? Even now, while I occasionally check my office mails or tell my mom to take care of my four-month old baby for a while so that I can wrap up a short call.. I feel sad.. why am I doing this.. am I being unfair to my kid? Being a working mom, will I always be in this dilemma? Due to financial reasons, I wont be able to quit my job immediately, but then aren’t these the years when my kid will need me the most??

Have no answer !! And at the same time, cant stop thinking either

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